Faire du pain perdu avec des baguettes de Viron qui coutent 4 euros.

Voila voila

Je suis sure qu'a peu près tous les Français qui vivent au Japon l'ont deja faite... Mais je ne résiste pas à l'envie.
C'est un onigiri (une portion de riz au poisson dans une feuille d'algue séchée, l'equivalent de notre sandwich baguette-jambon). Y'en a plein de trucs différents (thon, prunes...). Mais la, la nan.
(Je m'excuse).

NO PANTS!

(English below)

_____________________________________________________________________________

Je vous fais la version française pour 2 tablettes de chocolat noir au sel de chez carrouf (sans petit lait).

Je veux bien traduire, mais ça demande de l’énergie. Je ne peux pas travailler sans énergie dans ma tête.

OUI, le département traduction de mon cerveau ne fonctionne qu'au chocolat noir, pas de chèque.

Merci.

____________________________________________________

So yesterday started very well in a lovely museum (images to come - found at least 3 david stars pattern and ornaments!!!) until I realised 90% of the clothes sold in those massive malls in Tokyo I never really walked through before are MADE IN JAPAN.
Sound likes Japan has a massive textile industry. Also sounds like, if it's the case, I need to do my research. Big time. But that will happen after the 'oh my god I haven't shopped in 10 years I want to buy EVERY SINGLE THING'' moment.
I was totally in shock. I actually did the whole 8 floors of a Marui mall. It was like smoking and/or drinking for the first time. My head was spinning. Anyways, as my recent decision to stop dressing like a 14 year old boy and try to maintain a better appearance (don't ask me why, the quarter-life crisis or something) is getting on okay, I tried a few dresses.
So I go in, have to take my shoes off, and then the shop assistant reopens the curtain and apologises and gives me a tissue bag. I say thank you and clothes the curtain. I look at the thing, think for a good ten seconds, re-open the curtain and ask:
''I'm sorry, what is this? For? I? Don't understand?''
She tells me, ''Oh! This is fa-ee-sue-co-o-var''. 
I go, ''A face cover?!'' 
Then the connection happens in my brain, it's to not stain the clothes with your ton of foundation when you try the thing on. Right.
''Oh, thank's. Actually I am not wearing any make up'' half in Japanese, half in English, 80% with my hands and 12% with my facial expression (I know that's a total of 192%, but sometimes you feel the need to communicate and it overwhelms you, right?).
Her face... Her face when I said I wasn't wearing make up...
If I had told her 'Oh! But I'm not wearing any pants!' she would have had a less suprised face. I'm not even joking.

blablabla

I'm not quite sure why, but I've open a twitter account.
I guess I was feeling lonely, and I missed making people laugh as I used to on Facebook (as in, I missed the realisation that other people also found funny the stuff I heard, which made me feel part of... the... world?). Not sure.

Before that I jumped and danced on some music with Roman, you know, to get the morning started, between telling him he won't be able to go swimming if he. doesn't eat. his. flipping. BREAKFAST. for. the. 10th. time.

Lately the days have been a lumpy mixture of four things: trying to get as much done for my boss (keeping the place as tidy as I can which isn't easy for an untidy person, washing the dishes about ten times a day, folding clothes, making sure the pets aren't starving, adding meat and dairy protein to the dinner to please everyone), doing all I can for the kids (cooking food they will actually eat, driving the car in a responsible way, brushing up their musical education with James Brown and Michael Jackson, smelling their feet between the shower and the bath to make sure they don't stink, explaining why you have to clean your hands before eating - in Japanese it ain't easy lemme tell ya'all-, swallow my tongue and not say anything when another adult tell them they don't need to wear their seatbelt or wear it in a way that will be totally useless if we crash, carry them on my back making airplanes sounds, giving them french quizzes in the bath), try to keep up with my stuff to be a balanced and content human being ah ha (finishing an illustration, which takes me weeks, studying a little Japanese on my own when I have enough brain energy which is not often, going for a walk or a run with the stinky dog - ok that hasn't happened lately -, thinking about what I should do with my life giving the fact I am young and have strictly no career plan and will not set foot in a University ever again, deciding on weather is should or should't stress about the latter, making some music, telling myself I am not fat, finishing reading my books, like the five I am reading at the same time, thinking about where to restart Giving Peace Faces, keeping sending letters), and trying to not fall asleep at the wrong moments as I am happily swinging between hypersomnia and needing naps every day and at least nine hours of sleep at night and surprise-hey-hey-guess-who-insomnia at least a few good times a month with no apparent reasons, which makes for a very sleepy person at some point between 2 and 6pm.
Wow that was a very long sentence.

 How about a picture of food to lighten this up.

June

Career Plan.

Jim- Qu'est ce que tu veux être quand tu seras grand Roman?
Roman (quatre ans, sans hesitation aucune) - UN ENORME DINOSAURE ROUGE!
Jim- ...Bonne idée.

Jim- What would you like to become when you're older, Roman?
Roman (four years old, without hesitating) - A massive red dinosaur!!!
Jim- ... Fair enough.

For Ginny and Dvora

Here are the brave plants I bought. I will do my best not to kill them too fast.

On the left is 'Super Mint' (don't ask, I do not know why it is 'super') and Orange Mint. They also had Apple Mint.

My new reading place. 

Orange Hibiscus.

Tu sais que t'es la fille de ton père quand:
You know you are your dad's daughter when:

-Tu t'entends dire tout haut 'Hmmmmm, il est aimable comme une poignée de porte' quand tu croises un gars qui répond pas quand tu lui dit bonjour.
-You hear yourself say at loud ' Jee... He's as friendly as a door handle' when the guy you just said hello to didn't bother answering you.

-Tu t'exclames 'Oh la la... On est tombé sur un extrémiste... Mais avvannnnceeee bordeeelllll' quand la voiture de devant roule a 30, et que toi tu roules à 80.
-You go 'Oh my... an extremist... Fu*king mooooovvvveee..' when the car in front of yours is driving at 20 miles an hour and you 45.

Bon aller.

• J'ai fait tomber les clefs de voitures en tirant la chasse d'eau. Malgré des jurons epicés en cinq langues pendant les dix secondes qui suivirent et des prières aux dieux et demons des WC pour que les clefs soient trop lourdes pour être emportées, elles doivent maintenant se trouver dans des contrées inconnues. Ca va me couter une blinde. Genre le prix d'un tatouage. C'est une clef électronique. Duh. 

• J'ai acheté plein de fleurs, meme des Hibiscus, et des pots, et ca va mieux. C'est tout fleuris. Le balcon est devenue ville fleurie de France 2014.

• Keitaro san m'a demandé comment on dit quo-taux-dé-vahure.
  -Hein?
  -African country. Cop tot def ouare.
  -Ahhh... Tu veux dire Cote d'Ivoire?
  -Ah! Cautou D'efaire!
  -Nan. COTE D'IVOIRE. Ivory Coast. Cote d'Ivoire.  (Oui, j'ai un diplôme de traduction tu vois, c'est un metier (AH HHHAAA).)

• J'ai réussi pour la premiere fois au Japon a lire une phrase tout en kanji (bah attends, tu crois pas que j'vais réussir a lire une phrase en Kanji et pas me la peter un minimum). C'est a dire que y'avait personne chez le concessionnaire, et donc à 55% je me suis souvenue des Kanjis 'Mercredi’ （水曜日）ainsi que de 'vacance/congé' （休み） et à 45% j'ai utilisé le département raisonnement-par-deduction-observation-et-elimination de mon cerveau.

Bon aller.

Muffins and Recording (Francais Anglais).

Bon comme c'est la saison des pluies, j'suis a fond dans les gateaux.
Je marche plus, je fais des muffins, ca me va bien.

Now it's rainy season. My baking and cake consumption is clearly following the curve indicating the number of rainy days.

  

Aujourd'hui c'était muffin-citron-blueberrie-framboise-canelle-noix-carrottes-graines-de-tournesol-avoine.
Bah, c'est super bon. J'en ai gouté cinq, pour être bien sur que vraiment ils étaient cuits correctement (ils ne l'étaient pas, tant pis) (j'ai dit que j'aimais bien faire les gateaux, pas que je les faisais bien).

Today's muffin is lemon-carrot-blueberry-rasberry-cinnamon-walnut-seeds-oat muffin. Well, they're yummy if I may say so myself. I tasted five in a row, just to make sure they were cooked through the middle (which they were not but hey, who ever said I was good at cake? I like doing them, it ain't the same thing...).

Sinon, mon micro H1 Zoom l'est malade. Il fait des vieux bruits quand j'enregistre. Alors ni une ni deux, j'ai appelé Zoom Japon.

Mr Zoom (en Japonais)- Zoom Japon merci s'il vous plait?
Moi (en Japonais)- Bonjour merci pardon merci bonjour, parlez vous Anglais a tout hasard s'il vous plait?
Mr Zoom- Oui! Bien sur! (Comme si ca coulait de source - du genre les japonais parlent l'anglais en general, ha, la bonne blague - j'ai du tomber sur un rigolo des le matin).
Moi- Bonjour merci bonjouuuur. Dites, j'ai acheté un micro H1 tout neuf tout beau en Fevrier, v'la ti pas qu'il déconne a fond, il fait 'toc toc toc' en bruit de fond quand j'enregistre - et oui j'ai testé plusieurs endroits et plusieurs qualité d'enregistrement, meme je vous ai envoyé un exemple.
Mr Zoom- Ah!!! Merci d'accord merci, et bien... je pense que vous avez du mettre en route le metronome? (En fait, il avait mangé un clown ce matin la)
Moi- ... Y'a pas... de metronome... sur le H1..., monsieur Zoom... ( *pense* sois tu me prend pour une grosse débile, sois toi t'es un gros débile).


In other news, my Zoom mic is totally broken - it makes a beating sound when I record stuff. So I called Zoom Japan. Yes. I'm like that.

Mr Zoom (in Japanese)- Zoom Japan may I help you?
Moi (in Japanese)- Hello, good morning hello excuse me thank you excuse me hello, do you happen to speak English please excuse me?
Mr Zoom- Yes! Of course! (his 'of course' was a joke, I guess, cause Japanese people don't usually speak English, so he must have been a guy full of humour early morning).
Moi- Ok great. I bought a h1 mic recorder in February. It's now making some beating sound as I record - I tested it in different settings and it doesn't change the problem.
Mr Zoom- Ah! I see. Well, I think Misses, you must have put the metronome on! (ok, he was just a guy who likes jokes).
Moi-... Huh... there's kind of no metronome... on the h1 model... (*thinking* are you taking me for a complete idiot, or are YOU a complete idiot?)